Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
Randomize