My hair reeks of homosexuality.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
I have fence marks all over my body
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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