He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
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