brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
giving a 30 min presentation still drunk is like giving birth, upside down in a pit of snakes while being on fire.
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
