He is such a slut. More and more my type.
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
