i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize