Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
he high fived his dick after we had sex
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
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