My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Randomize
