Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
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