do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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