so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
well you can't waste a boner
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
Randomize
