would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
Randomize
