we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
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