its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
Please come collect your inebriated significant other. He just sleep-farted and scared my cats. Please hurry.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize