I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
Randomize
