Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
It was a blind-side dick pic.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
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