I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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