I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
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