the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
Randomize
