You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
