she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
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