Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
These Attractive Criminals Took Sexy Mugshots That Made Them Famous
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
This Girl’s Unbelievable Catfish Story Will Make You Rethink Online Dating
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag