We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
Randomize
