you know whats awesome about this morning. A suprise visit from my dad at 7:30 am. There was a pair of heels on the lawn and a girl sleeping in just her underwear on the floor of my living room. He either thinks im a champion or a total fuck up. I'm thinking fuck up but im hoping champion.
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
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