I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
Randomize
