Already got asked if we're dating
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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