the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
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One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
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I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
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