I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
Randomize
