You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Randomize
