I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
Randomize
