Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
Just so you know sleeping with you is like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
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