I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
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