Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
okay, but you can't tell anyone. Every time he instagrams something with the caption "avocado," it means he's booty calling me. Happy?
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
Randomize
