just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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