you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
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