There's a dead frog in my kitchen?
Yeah, you found him outside and decided to give him a bath with your roommates electric toothbrush.
The worst part is that you sang Air Supply songs to him as you did it. Poor guy died in the middle of "Making love out of nothing at all"
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
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