my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
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