In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
Randomize
