You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
Randomize