this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
Randomize
