He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
We have so much sex to catch up on
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Randomize
