so that wasnt chicken after all
Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
Just delivered a pizza to a holiday inn and a delivery driver from Me n Ed's walked up at the same time, we both were going to the same floor so we stood in the elevator making small talk about delivery stuff, but a small part of me wanted to deck him, stand over him and shout,"FOR THE HUT MOTHERFUCKER, FOR THE HUT!"
Jesus christ, don't start a pizza delivery gang war.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
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