Kareoke will never be a sober sport
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Randomize
