Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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