Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
Randomize
