where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
Randomize