we're blogging at a bar
Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
Randomize
