grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
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