32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
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