Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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