I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
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